I know someday I will need to explain my RA to OZL. I often wonder how it will come up. Will I be able to explain it so he understands? How will he react? I have always planned to be honest with him about it, because I truly think that honesty is the best policy. But that doesn't mean I am looking forward to it.
In any event, a fellow blogger at RheumatoidArthritis.net, Asha LeRay, recently wrote about how she told her four year old daughter about her RA. Because I strongly believe there need to be more resources out there for parents with RA (or other chronic pain) I wanted to share her post with you!
Read it here: Parenting Amidst the Pain.
You may be surprised that OZL will completely understand about your RA when you talk to him about it, Mariah. My daughter was about 7 when I was diagnosed. There were so many times when I couldn't do all the things I'd have liked to do with her. I did my best, though, and tried not to feel too bad about it.
She's an adult, now. A few years ago I asked her how she felt about my RA when she was little. Did she feel cheated by having a frequently disabled, frequently hurting Mom?
She was utterly surprised by my questions. NO, she said. You were just great! And she told me that she'd understood, even as young as she was, that my RA wasn't something I asked for, but that it just WAS. She was happy for all the things I COULD do with her.
She made me feel a lot better about the kind of Mom I'd been when she was little. I think we tend to be too hard on ourselves.
You do your best, Mariah. It will be enough.
Sending hugs your way... :)
I don't have kids, but I was a kid with a mother that worked many, many hours for years until I was 10 and then got hurt and had RA, Fibro and Degenerative Disc Disease.
What kids want is their parents time. It doesn't have to be time spent hiking mountains, it just needs to be time spent together. I assure you, it will be enough.
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