Wednesday, September 12, 2012

California Coast Classic: Day Three

Today APL rode about 40 miles from Monterey to Big Sur. He checked in with me and sent a few pictures this morning, but I haven't heard from him since. I assume that his phone died or maybe there's no reception where they are camping tonight. Hopefully we'll get an update on his progress tomorrow. 

Today OZL and I were both feeling pretty exhausted from the past few busy days of visiting, so we spent a quiet day at grandpa's house. Unfortunately, we still had a pretty rough day. (TMI warning!) OZL had some major trouble with his tummy today (constipated baby = I don't recommend the experience). I'm fairly certain the trouble has to do with adjusting to his 100% formula diet since we arrived in California (at home he was still getting defrosted breast milk a few times a day). So today OZL was struggling and straining and miserable and screaming, and I ended up feeling totally horrible about the whole situation, especially because every website I looked at for advice about baby constipation told me that he wouldn't be constipated in the first place if I was still breastfeeding (insert mommy guilt here). I know that weaning was the right decision for both of us, but seeing my baby in pain because of that decision was extremely difficult for me - especially since my poor boobs are still full and swollen and SO extremely sore, despite my two weeks of slow weaning. My boobs are so painful that I have resorted to the old wives's tale solution of wearing cabbage leaves in my bra. I have no idea if it is really helping, but it feels mildly satisfying to at least be trying something. Because it is fairly horrific when your boobs ache with poison milk that you cannot feed your baby, who is crying miserably because his tummy hasn't adjusted to the formula you are trying to feed him instead. It has been a hard day for both of us.

But I also got a reminder today of exactly why I stopped breastfeeding in the first place: my RA took a turn for the worse. Despite the prednisone and the Enbrel injection last Friday, I woke up this morning with severe pain in my knees. The extra pain did not help me get through this day, but it did remind me that I made the right decision in stopping breastfeeding (though my boobs clearly still disagree). Today my knee made it difficult to get up and down and hold and rock my crying, unhappy baby. So it's obviously time to let my meds start doing their job again so I can feel better. I had no time to spare.

Luckily, grandpa (my dad) was extremely wonderful and supportive and helpful today. Hopefully OZL and I will both get some good sleep tonight and be feeling better tomorrow. And hopefully APL is doing awesome and we will get an update from him in the morning.

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